Too Good a Mother? How Intense Maternal Instincts Results in Depression

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05.12.2018
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Motherhood: The Greatest Blessing to Women

It all starts when the little one starts to grow in a woman’s womb- the obsession, the caressing, and the nourishment- all such maternal instincts begin to confide in her which brings her closer to her child but what happens when the child is born? The subtle obsession, worry and anxiety to keep the baby safe grow deeper and start to play with her emotions which lead to post-partum depression.  What are the consequences? The women know it better, which a man may never know and hence women who are doing nothing about it should jolt forward towards the battlefield. Today is a good day to gift oneself peaceful motherhood! 

Is it really about parenting or Mothering?

Motherhood has been deemed to be one of the most mentally and physically taxing enterprises. Almost all the parents will associate the inexpressible joys with intense feelings of anxiousness, fear, helplessness, worry, postpartum depression and this is how “parenting paradox” is born. Constantly keeping a check on your baby and excessive worry is a sign of intense parenting and degraded mental health.

Smart novel research sheds light on how mothers’ attitudes about parenting impact their mental health, thereby increasing odds of depression and anxiety. The researchers in five steps have explained intense parenting.

Essentialism: It is the feeling of mothers that they are more necessary and capable parent.

Fulfilment: A belief that a parent’s happiness is derived largely from their kids.

Stimulation: It is an ideology of motherhood to intellectually stimulate activities for their child’s development.

Challenge: Mothering takes war on women, and the job is as challenging as being a corporate executive.

Child-Centred: It is a maternal instinct that their children’s needs and wants should be fulfilled before their own.

Snowed Under with Obsessive-compulsive disorder?

“I think of all the ghastly events that could happen to my daughter — the mishaps, the illnesses, — I am no longer able to handle the pressure mounting on me. I gasp with fear, feel an adrenaline rush, try to calm my nerves down”, says a 32-year-old African mother who has a 3-year-old daughter.

Taking into account the overall population, postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder afflicts close to 2 percent of childbearing women, which is twofold the rate of O.C.D. Therefore it becomes mandatory for women to get screened during and post pregnancy. 

A clinical psychologist and assistant professor in the University of British Columbia department of psychiatry, has explained that almost all new mothers had intrusive thoughts of accidental harm befalling their baby, a symptom which is quite similar to O.C.D.

Many moms are struggling with anxiety and depression, and some are suffering more exotic maladies, like vertigo, heart palpitations and lingering coughs. The study revealed that women are at an elevated risk of developing postpartum depression. The likelihood of developing anxiety disorder and depression is respectively 60% and 70% more when compared to men.

The odds of developing chronic fatigue syndrome are fourfold in women, and they are also at greater risk of insomnia, which is a consequence of mental stress. Various solid studies have suggested a link between brain chemistry and genetic makeup. Many people with O.C.D. do not get treated for it, but for those who do; medication and cognitive behavioural therapy has proved to be 70 percent beneficial.

If intensive parenting has been associated with almost all negative mental health outcomes, why do women do it? Those women out there must be posing the same question to themselves. Well, scientifically proven – Mothers these days are trying to be the better and best, leaving no stone unturned in enhancing their child’s cognitive, social and emotional outcomes, and thus this attitude worsens the mental stability of mothers.

A Child’s One Step towards Mother’s Well-being can save the Goddess

Mothers should go for timely health check-ups and should routinely visit their gynaecologists. They should undertake various blood tests for keeping in check their Blood Pressure, normal range being 120/80 and should timely evaluate their cholesterol and glucose levels (fasting sugar of 70-110 normal range).

Mothers should be screened for cancer if symptoms persist.  The most common cancer among women is breast cancer (symptoms being lumping in the breasts, pain, nipple retraction, discharge from nipple) for which women should be made to undergo routine mammography and Pap smear tests.

Incorporating a healthy and balanced diet alongside moderate to high levels of physical activity is mandatory. Diet should be rich in roughages (salads) proteins and minerals (intake of nuts), antioxidants (derived from green tea), Flax Seed (which are enriched with fibre, good fats and potentially mitigates cholesterol), Yogurt (which is high on proteins and probiotic). Other foods such as green leafy vegetables and oats are beneficial too. Kidney beans, which are high on proteins and Apple cider vinegar, which helps regulate the glucose levels have been associated with enhancing bodily functions.

Children should encourage their mothers to join yoga sessions and indulge in meditation and should accompany their mothers to the gym or jog hours. Other than these elements, children should give emotional support to their mothers and should lend a hand in the household chores.

This Mother's Day every child should spend the entire day with their mothers and take them for a health check-up so that there long-overlooked health issues that are often swept under the carpet can be addressed. The most common being Calcium and Vitamin D deficiencies, which put them at risk of osteoporosis. Various healthcare platforms have emerged in India, due to which availing treatment in India has become even more feasible. One of such platforms is Medmonks- envisioned to deliver quality services to patients. Medmonks, led by professional healthcare executives connects patients to the best hospitals. Other than medical assistance, they also help patients get a medical visa and make necessary arrangements. Gift a health check-up to your mom this Mother’s day.

This Mother’s Day spread a little cheer in her Life

Sahiba Rana

Wearing a million-watt smile and treasuring a zillion metaphors, she finds solace in deep poetry and..

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